Case details: Steve v. Mickey Mouse: (Court of Opinion)

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2008-10-03

Steve v. Mickey Mouse

Case Type:

General Knowledge

Status:

Verdict Reached

Terms:

seven judges or 72 hours, whichever comes first
Plaintiff:

dragonfly1

Plaintiff's Argument:

My really good friends (let's call them P+G) have been married for years. A couple years ago they bought some pass to Disneyland and they pretty much go there about twice a month now. Seriously, every time I call them on the weekends, they're at Disneyland. Ugh. I think they're insane to hit the crowds and that heat and that traffic without actually being forced to do it by some 6 year old kid (they go by themselves). They seem to love it for reasons they have not quite been able to articulate to me. P+G have lived in L.A. most of their lives, by the way, so it's not like it's a novelty -- and they live about an hour away on a good day. They are nuts, right?
Defendant:

Mickey
Defendant's Argument:

I would have to disagree with your testimony. I do not believe that we ... uh... "P&G" are nuts because Disneyland can be awesome if you know how to do it right.

The first step to having an enjoyable Disney experience is to be open enough to allow yourself to have a good time. (One could even say “be in touch with your inner child”, but that sounds a lot worse on paper than it does when you’re riding “Space Mountain”.)

Second, you have to know how to beat the crowds (or at least most of them). Knowing how/where to park is key to this. “Downtown Disney” allows 3 hour parking (5 with restaurant validation), which is usually more than enough time on a Sunday, which is, um…, ‘probably’ when “P&G” go due to the weekend blockout dates on their annual passes. Not that I would know, or anything.

Also, you have to know where the ‘alternate’ park entrances are to avoid the masses of the asses assembling to get in the front gate (The “Monorail” in Downtown Disney gets you dropped off near right Space Mountain in the main park, and the “California Grand Hotel” has a seldom used entrance into the “California Adventure” park.)

For example, an average Sunday’s Disney experience could be summed up in this timeline example:

8:50 am : Arrive/Park at Downtown Disney

9:00 am : Take Monorail to Space Mountain

9:10 am : Enjoy the high speed twists and turns of Space Mountain

9:20 am : Briskly walk past the Matterhorn (as it banged the crap out of your knees last time) on your way to the Indiana Jones Ride.

9:30 am to 10:30 am: Ride the “Indian Jones Ride”, “Pirates of the Caribbean”, “Haunted House”, “Thunder Mountain Railroad” and finally “Splash Mountain” (FastPasses optional)

10:30 am : Leave Park

10:40 am : Enter “Disney’s California Adventure” through the “California Grand Hotel” and enjoy the following rides (order optional): “Soaring Over California”, “Grizzly River Run”, “California Screamin’”, “Monsters Inc.” (fun “kid ride”), and finally “Tower of Terror”.

12:00 : Leave “California Adventure” and head over to ESPN Zone to watch last hour of “Jet’s” game while enjoying a Smokehouse Burger and tasty cold beverage.

2:00 pm : Return home, relishing in your day’s Disney accomplishments.

If the scenario above still does not seem appealing, the Disneyland experience could be considered much more enjoyable since the advent of Downtown Disney's various drinking establishments, such as Tortilla Joe’s, ESPN Zone, and House of Blues. Within Disney’s “California Adventure” theme park, you also have the “Golden Vine Winery”, not to mention “Ariel's Grotto” (formerly "Wolfgang Puck's Avalon Cove") which serves the strongest Mai Tai’s I’ve ever had (seriously).

~ Someone who's not "P" (oh, and did I mention the Churros?)